You have no doubt experienced bereavement in your own life. Think back to this experience. What among the various things people said or did, was most helpful for you at this time?
Monday, July 10, 2017
Death & Dying Customs
Did the information on preparing a body according to Muslim, Buddhist & Jewish customs ring true for you? Can you add anything to the information? Have you had any experience with death and dying customs practised in other religions such as Christianity or Hinduism? Can you describe your experience?
You have no doubt experienced bereavement in your own life. Think back to this experience. What among the various things people said or did, was most helpful for you at this time?
You have no doubt experienced bereavement in your own life. Think back to this experience. What among the various things people said or did, was most helpful for you at this time?
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ReplyDeleteThe customs on preparing a body of any religion are quite different. Actually, I have no experience with other traditions besides Buddhist being seem quite authentic. However, there have been some main processes not mentioned Buddhist custom yet. Firstly, after death of Buddhism, the body can be washed by their family and close relative, worn the most suitable beautiful clothes for them, and prepared then for particularly cremation. Secondly, their family often traditionally held on the third, seventh, one-hundredth day after the death, or some families continue once a year.
ReplyDeleteIn terms of bereavement, I experienced my mother's bereavement from pancreatic cancer nine years ago. This departure always reminds me that the life is short, and nothing exists forever. It is helpful for me that I should often be happy in life and look after my family as much as possible.
I’ll say that the burial ceremonies are quite differences in details by place to place, Mint. I would like to share my experiences when my father died from a liver cancer two years ago. Our family had such a short time that is within one year after the terminal illness was diagnosed. We made a major plan together to make him laugh and to recall good memories in ours family, and we had been doing the best for him. We attempted to show him how much the life enjoyable. For example, we travelled and ate together more often than in the past. After dinner we had always been talking funny stories when we were a child and cared for him until he felt asleep. At that time, I usually worked hard preparing the several topics to talk in the evening, and trying to run the process smoothly. I occasional saw my mother hiding her tears and had quietly crying alone in the kitchen when she cooked the best dish for her husband. I saw the scare and the sorrowful though her sights that reminded me to be aware something might be emerged in the situation especially mental health problems of the care givers. Yes, it was my mother who I intended care as same as my father. I must be the strongest person to support all in the family until we passed the bad time with proper responding. There were many things helping persons who facing the bereavement. Firstly, the one’s knowledge and an acceptance of the death are the key indicators to estimate the levels of support that relatives need during they are fighting with the lost. Secondly, the unique of family’s members, if all are empathy, they would support each other. These could be a strengthen point to assist during the frightening period together. Lastly, in rural areas, it is undeniable that neighborhoods are important to support the grieved person, for instance, in my mother case during the day- light time, there were 2-4 elderly people switching to talk with her, and spend the day time together for a month long, and I accepted that this factor was effectively to help my mother recover in a short time.
DeleteI'am sorry to hear that Mint.You are strong and optimistic woman. I think, you have learned the life from bereavement . Consequently, You are a lucky person who know about the real value of life. Support you , belove sis.
DeleteThe picture illustrates a cremated ceremony in the Buddhist way. Buddhists believe that the death or impermanence if life is commonly and naturally because the dead person will rebirth again and again. According to the religious legends, after death, a spirit will be taken by messengers of death listening to the judge from the justice angle. The appraisement was based on the levels of the Karma (cause and effect), every action which had been done by the dead person when he/she was still alive classified into the ranges of positives and negatives, in the latest life- time which is influencing late or soon and good or bad of the next life’s occurrence and appearance (happiness or suffering). This might shows a religious metaphor to shape people doing the good karma for living peace in societies.
ReplyDeleteIn the funeral ceremony, the relatives did the best for the death for several reasons. Firstly, in term of the religious believe, relatives and people, whom are concerned the dead person, come to the ceremony to pray to the Buddha helping the death will find the best in the further life such as healthy or wealthy life. Secondly, family’s members donated many valuables for communities and temples such as money, properties, scholarships to students, and so on. In addition, some personal belongings or housing utensils were burnt coincidently cremating the body because they believe that the spirit might utilizes them in the next world. For the relatives and family’s members terminally did for their loved person, it is implied that the dead person deserves all the best things in this world. Moreover, this can be explained the respect and honour to the loved one who passed away.
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ReplyDeleteTo be honest, I have never experienced with the death and dying ceremonies in other religions, except Buddhism. For the ordinary death and dying custom in northern Thailand, after a person died, the relatives will take the person’s body to the funeral home. After the death body arrives home, the body is laid out on a table and covered with a cloth. Only the head and the right hand is showing. People then take turns to pour some scented water over the exposed hand. You can take this opportunity to make a blessing or to ask for forgiveness for past misdeeds. After that, a sacred white string, called sai sin, is tied around the ankles and wrists. The hands are held together in a prayer-like gesture holding a lotus flower and incense sticks as well as a coin is also put in the mouth. The body is then placed in a coffin and placed on a high table. Next, it is surrounded by flowers, wreaths, candles and sticks of incense. In addition, a photograph of the death person is placed alongside, and coloured lights are hanged around the coffin and the photograph. For an ordinary funeral, the cremation takes place within three days or sometimes it is deferred for a week to allow distant relatives to attend. In this case a chapter of monks comes to the house one or more times each day to chanting.
ReplyDeleteIn relation to bereavement, I have experienced my grandfather’s funeral. I remember at the last night of the funeral, the monk taught us before chanting. The monk said “all of us will pass away eventually as a part in the natural process so that you should always keep in mind the impermanence of life. In addition, no one can escape death and unhappiness thus if you expect only happiness in life, you will be disappointed. Moreover, when you die you can't take anything at all with you, as a result you should make you consider how important many things are to you and what is important in your live then”. These are beneficial for me nowadays, for this reason it helps me to be aware of the death and to live consciously.
I had an experience with death and dying customs practised in Buddhism. Last year, son of my boss pass away from respiratory failure. He just only eleven years old. On doleful day, after he had die my boss called me and told about sad story. I hurry went to hospital. When I arrived I embraced my boss who is a mother had lost lovely son. I stayed with her about three hours for support her loss , she was crying and said good bye her son. After that I helped her to clean his body, take a bath and close every orifice of body. Next day we went to temple for funeral ceremony. This ceremony approximately three days , every in the evening monks had prayed. Until forth day , the cremation was begin. The family and close relative came to temple and gave small flower which the emblem to commemorate for dead person to the boy who pass away.
ReplyDeleteThe death is the truth of life and the humans can’t escape. Therefore, we should spend our worth life for help other people. Moreover, we should prepare for dignity death which family support is the most factor to complete it.
I would like to share an experiencing that I had participate in the funeral of my grandmother's sister, after marriage her converted to Christianity following her husband, she became seriously ill and died. Me and my family went to the funeral and saw the ceremony. I learned to about somethings that different funeral procession from Buddhism. After the death of my grandmother's sister the church minister visited the relatives's family to help the person to prepare for their death. At the time, the church minister will organise the funeral. Friends will often send their sympathies in the form of cards and flowers to the dead's family. The ceremony conducted by the minister.The ceremony involve an expression of thanks to or love and respect for dead person included readings and prayer by both the minister and the death's family and friends.After that before carried out to burial place.There is often the opportunity for families and friends to view the dead person and to say their last goodbyes before the dead body is buried and marked a gravestone to remember the grandmother 's sister. In an anniversary of the death, family and friends may come and visit the grave to remember my grandmother 'sister will be placed on the grave as a sign of respect.After loss that I have learned about death during that time ,anything can happen all of the time.It is true you can’t save anyone.The biggest thing I could do for the love one who still alive is take care of them the best as much as I can.
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ReplyDeleteTo be honest, I have no experienced for caring dying patients or the death from other religions except Buddhist. The dying patients in Buddhist have different case. For example, in case of patients who suffer from chronic disease and they do not want to resuscitation, medical staffs will encourage their family member to take care patients for relatives to spend time in the end of life of patients as long as possible. In accident cases, medical staff will separate relatives for resuscitation about 30 minutes then the next step of treatment depend on patient’s symptom. If patients still alive, staff will tell their family members about symptom of patients and progression but if patients are not, staffs will lead their family members to say goodbye to patients. This is examples to care dying patients in the hospital when I work.
ReplyDeleteIn case of the death, it is quite similar in all of Thailand. After people die at my hometown, in the eastern of Thailand, some family will bring dead people to the funeral at their home but others bring dead people to the funeral at the temple. The first step, relatives bring the dead people lay down on the bed or table, cover all body with cloth, and exposed hand for family members or relatives to pour water on hand dead and say goodbye or forgiveness to dead people. Subsequence, in the evening, Monks will pray around 30 minutes to 1 hour for 3 nights, 5 nights, or even 7 nights that depend on each family because it is generally believed that is the way to send the dead to the heaven. In the last day, it is the day for cremation. Then, relatives store bone ash to scatter the sea or the river and some parts are kept at home.
After the funeral, Thai family members take care of each other. I have experienced in bereavement in my family about 2 years ago that my great-grandmother pass away from sepsis. That happened very fast in my senses because she admitted with anemia and pneumonia for 3 or 4 days before death. After her funeral, the most affected person was my grandmother. She did not want to talk to each other. She blamed herself for being great-grandmother dead because she thought she let her mother to hospital late. That was difficult time of my family, my family decided to let my grandmother to travel in other provinces, to go to temple for making merit and so on. My family took care of each other’s feelings all the time and spend time together as much as possible, especially, on weekend. One hundred days later, we made merit for the death at the temple again. Approximately 6 months, feeling of our family was get better. Nowadays, my family make merit for my great-grandmother every year in June that is the month of her death and she is always still in our mind forever.
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ReplyDeleteI experienced bereavement, it was so sad for me. When my grandmother died, it made me feel depressed.She suffered from the disease because she had diabetes for over 20 years,I should met her if it was possible, but I could not go to meet her in the last chance . After my grandma died, her body was cleaned and was kept in a coffin which was decorated with fresh flowers and her photograph was placed at the front of the coffin.The religious ceremony of Buddhist had been prepared about 3 days, after that the cremation was prepared at the graveyard of the village. I put my grandma's golden necklace which I gave her when I got the first salary in the coffin because I knew this necklace was important for her and she loved it too much. The bone ash of grandmother was kept in the temple, I pay respect when I come back to my hometown. One month later, after grandma's death, when I slept, I dreamed of her. I think because of our close relationship. However, I recognise about her love and kindness forever.
ReplyDeleteIn 2019....I still read this ...miss you all
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